Your skin is just like pearls! You are beautiful, unique, and special! You are adored, cherished, and loved!
Every day, my husband and I work hard to affirm our girls so that they are confident, assertive, and bold in who they are in the world. These are ten practices and activities that we incorporate in our household.
- Daily Affirmation Statements- we have our children repeat bold and affirming statements so they eternalize the meaning and develop confidence in who they are and their abilities. Examples of those are: I am beautiful. I am intelligent. I am strong. I deserve to be here. I am loved. I am special. I love the skin that I am in. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
- Compliments- we compliment them on their attributes and strengths and encourage them to do the same towards each other.
- Recite Poems-I learned Phenomenal Woman by Dr. Maya Angelou at a very young age, reciting it at various oratorical and pageant competitions, and it has been a part of my life journey ever since. I know the power of eternalizing poems to develop self-esteem. Hey Black Child along with I Love Me (authored by my husband and featured in his book Fred and Mary) are two of the poems we taught our girls to instill that self-love in them.
- Read Children’s Books- we engage the girls in a nightly read-aloud routine. They literally ask for this special family time. We carefully select books that reflect messages and values that we want them to learn or further support. Some of the selections include “I Like Myself”, “When God Made You”, “Dream Big Little One”, and “I Am Enough” along with my personal Tori children’s book collection that I authored.
- Sing Songs- we sing kid songs, mainstream songs, and even get creative and make up original family songs that have positive messages. One of our youngest daughter’s favorite songs is I Love My Hair.
- Define Character- we discuss as a family the traits we believe define having a good character and identify the ones we need to help us become the person we desire to be. The girls chose things such as being helpful, kind, and honest.
- Choose Kindness- there are always times when we get frustrated or someone makes us upset. In those moments, we teach the girls to choose kindness and extend grace towards each other. A lot of hugs are given during those moments.
- Deep Conversations- we are no longer in a place where you can avoid certain conversations. Examples of social injustices, racism, colorism, and gender bias are all around us. We have age-appropriate deep conversations to scaffold their knowledge, answer their questions, and address their insecurities.
- Family Prayer Time- a family that prays together, stays together is a quote that is often stated. I believe it’s true. I have found from personal experience that prayers definitely helps get you through the toughest times while keeping your family unit intact.
- Take Lots of Pictures- I just love a good selfie and photo. I believe it’s a part of loving and appreciating all that you are and what you do. Preserving those memories are even more important in documenting your personal journey.
BONUS: Say I Love You- there isn’t a day that goes by that my husband and I don’t tell the girls that we love them. We literally say it about ten times a day. We make sure they feel loved by us, know they can talk to us, and give them a lot of opportunities to laugh and develop positive memories.
Comment with ways you build your girls’ self-esteem. Stay tuned for more family moments. Let’s stay connected.
Until next time,
Xoxo